It is so funny that you always want what you can't have! I always wanted straight hair, but instead was given wavy hair. I wanted to be naturally skinny, and instead, I'm naturally . . . "not-so-skinny." I wanted a dog growing up, and instead, had hermit crabs! None of the things I had were at anyway bad, but it so funny how what we think we want isn't always what we need!
I never thought I would have huge desires about my children except that I wanted them to be happy and healthy. Then, when Jovey began chattering, which quickly turned into words, which even more quickly turned into sentences, I found myself wanting a quiet child. When those sentences turned into her ways of acting out, I found myself wanting a more compliant child. Then, I talk to friends that have quiet children who wish they had chattier children or children that had a stronger will (although I don't know if that's something to ever wish for! ha ha!)
In the end, I have found that God gives us each what we need, from each of the millions of hairs on our head to the things that make our children so very wonderful, beautiful and unique. It's only human to think the grass is greener in someone else's yard, but we forget all the flowers and old tree stumps and holes that make our yards our own.
I know that there are days when I would love Jovey to follow everything to a tee and just give me a chance to clear my head by playing quietly by herself (yes, even in self play, she talks to herself, her dolls, her books, etc.) but I would never trade the gift that God has given me in her being able to say, "Mommy, I love you so very much!" or when she must know when I'm feeling "less than cute" or just major "preggo" and says "Mommy, you are so cute! I love your eyes!" I am learning to quit "wanting" things and instead, to be more thankful for all the blessings I have been given, even through the constant chattering and challenges that come along with my growing and beautiful 2 year old daughter.